If there’s anywhere in the whole world where one is overwhelmed with how much one has to give, it certainly has to be in Nigeria.
We don’t look for responsibilities and where to spend our money like people in developed countries who have so much money to spend and sometimes have to look for where and how to spend the money. And when they can’t find, they will resort to charities or worthy causes to spend the money.
Here responsibilities look for us.
From people calling you that their seventh child is in hospital and that they are looking for money to give them adequate treatment to cousins, of course there are plethora of them – from immediate cousins to distant cousins to fifth generation cousins – all calling you for money to buy recharge cards or money for pocket money and all what not.
To the troubles of your siblings. And this is especially hard when you are the first child because these ones don’t ask for money, they tell you to give them money, as if it is their right, as if they worked with you to earn the money and when you get mad because of their eternal demands, they will tell you to remind them why you are so privileged to be called big brother or big sister in the first place.
To our darling darling churches. How can we forget them. There’s hardly any Sunday where there’s no need for money. If it’s not money for condolence visits, then it’s money to change the whole lighting system or money for new chairs or pews or money to finally start that mega church building.
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We are awash with eternal want for our money.
Amid all these cacophonies of demanding and giving, how do you give so you won’t lose your mind?
Give it a percentage.
Yes, I mean it. Give it a percentage. How much do you earn in a month, how much of your income are you willing to give out every month, do the maths and be satisfied that you have done your absolute best. Give it away and rest. You won’t come and kill yourself.
The truth is that if you give people and organizations the opportunity, all your income won’t be enough for them. They will want you to give everything and even borrow to give.
We spend a lot of energy and time fighting the numerous troubles and squabbles in our lives and don’t think that this is an important fight to fight? It is an important fight I assure you, one that you have to fight for your income to close up all possible leakages. Like we keep repeating on this blog about the importance of saving: If you don’t control your giving, how do you save? How do you invest? How do you build wealth?
The major point of this article is that at the end of the month, you will have enough to save and invest and not have to give all away because it is in the activities of saving and investing do one build enduring wealth.
For some people, curtailing what they give is the least of their problem. It is not if they pick the call in the first place. They will simply do what they can and forget about it.
But there are people who will die from the guilt when they can’t give or when they can only give but small.
See {5 Ways To Donate Effectively}
Just give it a percentage and when next your mind torments you that you have to give more, remind yourself that you have already done your ten or twenty or whatever percentage you choose and that it is the best you can do. It will help you quell the internal torment so that it won’t arouse deep-rooted emotions like questioning yourself why you are not even wealthy in the first place, which will lead to more and more and more questions until it hurts.
Above all, this is not being selfish to people, and it is not a way of depriving you of that immense joy and satisfaction that comes from giving. But as they say, sow your cloth according to your size.
There’s only a limited amount of help you can offer and that help no matter how small can still give you all those joyful emotions that givers enjoy.
In the End Everyone Benefits
It is always painful in the beginning but in the end everyone benefits. You will have more money to spend, more money to give to your siblings, more money for other members of your family and all those cousins, including the fifth generation ones will also benefit.
It’s a win-win for everyone.
What other ideas do you have as to giving or do you disagree with me? Tell me in the comment section.
5 Comments
This makes a lot of sense, some of us go an extra mile to borrow so as to give. Its hard to say no, I don’t know if its an African culture or what, we surely need to wake up.
Hello Anita, thank you for your input. I think it’s important to start learning how to say no as long as you have done your best.
Quite an interesting post, it will safe one from ‘Crab mentality’
Thank you Wisdom for stopping by. It surely will.
This interesting, sometimes you don’t have but you go along way giving even what you don’t have